Oh, it’s a scene man

NOTE: Since I basically have no computer, I started writing this post at K-Mart of all fucking places and then never finished it because the adult with disabilities I was with fell and it was a whole shit storm. So pretend you’re reading this last Friday.

<last Friday> TBU’s mom is staying with us this weekend. I am excited and nervous. Excited because I know TBU is excited and because I genuinely like her. Nervous because I feel like anything she finds fault with will be blamed on my shortcomings as a person, girlfriend, and/or female of the species. I don’t think there is any validity to this, I just need things to be anxious about. That’s just my chemistry.

<now> It turns out we had a great time. We took her sailing and and TBU is officially the #1 son (there are three). Sailing was my idea, so he’s really riding my coattails as #1 girlfriend of son. But whatever. Friday night she drank us under the table without even trying. Without even knowing there was a table to drink us under. Do not mess with TBUs mom, people. Saturday she bought us a BED! TBU and I had been sleeping on a trundle bed pushed together for over a year. And his mom swoops in and buys us an effing california king. It’s been life changing. I wake up and I actually feel like I’ve slept. When you haven’t had that in a while you forget what it’s like.

Anyway, The Millionizer must go to work. I’ll get L’amour a power cord soon.

The Millionizer drinks all of the vodka but leaves you the rum