Unskinny bop

In between working and studying for my final, on Tuesday, I have been noting songs I want to add to my karaoke repertoire. I don’t do it often but when I do, I like to blow.* I’m determined to get a couple Poison songs under my belt and maybe a Depeche Mode song. Depeche Mode is tricky though, it’s very low and will only rock if the crowd is into it. What am I saying? Of course the crowd will be into it. It’s the Millz and Depeche Mode, that’s a lethal combination. It’s like auditory opiates. I believe opiates are the universal drug, nobody doesn’t like ‘em. That’s only a theory though, no epidemiological evidence to back it up. I just like them so much I don’t want to meet the person who doesn’t. Although I could have already met them and not know it because it’s not like I ever bring it up. I need to stop, I sound like a junkie, which is inaccurate, I swear. Would a junkie hold down a job, a blog, a myspace page and school? A functioning junkie yes, but that’s beside my point. I’m intimate with opiates because of several surgeries since childhood. See? Totally on the up and up. No one ever has a problem with legal drugs.

*Ah, to blow. Sir Chinko and I refer to singing as blowing which is as sexual as our relationship gets. We’re not just singing we’re fucking blowing, like the speakers, and your mind. One time we had plans to karaoke “Total Eclipse of the Heart,” by Bonnie Tyler. So in anticipation I google messaged him at work: We are gonna blow Bonnie Tyler so hard. No response. A few minutes later he called. Apparently his boss was at his computer and only said, I don’t care what you do outside of work.

Oh, oh! Speaking of opiates, I know why I haven’t been able to give up cheese. Apparently it digests into mild opiates in your intestinal tract. At least that’s what some internet doctor said, believe what you will. I buy it though. My god, cheese is like teenage sex. Ravishing and snuck in several times a day.

Monkey Busker II has come home. Pics to follow. I spent a half hour in Petsmart judging the prettiness, flowiness and activity levels of about 65 male bettas before making my choice. He is a handsome man. I know you guys think my animals are boring but I can’t help talking about them. My apologies.

The Millionizer has a work holiday brunch/party tomorrow

P -motherfucking- S: Can the internet just stop talking about 2 girls 1 cup? Please? C’mon you guys, it’s gone too far. It’s people eating, nay savoring shit for fucks sake. We need to move past this as a community, it’s imperative to our survival. No wonder the internet isn’t taken seriously, some amazing things happen on these tubes and it’s overshadowed by some Brazilian dude and his fucked up fetish. There are parodies of reaction videos, it’s too much, it’s over. Ok. I’m gonna go to bed and I expect we will have forgotten about it by the time I wake up. Thank you.